Jealous Love: The Tension Between God's Love and Anger

(Excerpt from my latest paper)

What we believe about God’s nature shapes not only how we relate to him, but how we understand our own identity as his people. This is perhaps why the depiction of God being angry and even wrathful in the Old Testament Prophets is confusing to those trying to reconcile his anger with what Scripture teaches us about his compassionate, loving nature. What many fail to see is the picture that the Old Testament Prophets paint of a God so passionately in love that he is hurt and angry when those he loves reject him. If God were apathetic towards his people and their rejection of Him and his ways, then he could not truly be seen as a God of love. Yet even in his anger God’s desire is always to reconcile his people to himself. God’s nature is not anger; his nature is love that is so strong it is sometimes provoked to anger.

An inability to reconcile God’s love with his anger arises out of misconceptions due to flawed comparisons. Greek philosophy taught that a perfect being could not become hurt or angry with his creation. In the first century, Philo, a Jewish philosopher applied this Stoic understanding to Yahweh God. This same misconception was perpetuated by C.H. Dodd in the twentieth century who explained God’s anger and wrath not as emotions but as metaphors for the consequences of sin. Dodd and others like him picture a God devoid of dignity who, in the name of love, allows his creation to disregard his holiness and sin against him and each other.  This kind of teaching also clearly dismisses Scripture which describes God as having numerous emotional responses including what we may think are negative emotions such as anger and wrath.  God clearly describes himself as an intensely emotional being who of his own will makes himself vulnerable to the actions and attitudes of his people. In the Old Testament God refers to himself as jealous for the faithful love of his people using the Hebrew word qana. Qana describes not only an emotional state, but an emotion which registers physically as the face turning red. This clearly is not a God who is apathetic or who casually overlooks the rebellion of his people.

In modern times misconceptions can arise when a perspective is colored through personal experiences of anger. Human anger is usually retaliation against those who have caused hurt and results in a loss of self-control. However, in Scripture God’s anger is never a result of his loss of self-control, nor is he motivated by vindictiveness. Rather, God’s anger is initiated by his justice and responds to sin with the correct judgment

In order to have the correct perspective on the anger and judgment of God, it is important to see the big picture. First we must understand that “God is love” (I John 4:8) and every action that he takes is rooted in his love nature. Whether he is showing compassion or punishing the wicked; both actions are motivated by love, not anger, hatred or vindictiveness. Secondly, that God can be provoked to anger means that he is not apathetic to injustices perpetrated on his creation. Neither is his judgment eternal, but someday he will completely cleanse the earth of wickedness and establish his Kingdom on the earth where he will rule as the “Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace. Of the increase of his government and of peace there will be no end… with justice and with righteousness from this time forth and forevermore. The zeal of the Lord of hosts will do this” (Isaiah 9:6-7).

The Great Cloud of Witnesses

As a child I was a pioneer, an adventure seeker, an explorer.  My favorite book was Robinson Cruiso and I had a crazy crush on Franz from Swiss Family Robinson.  It was amazing the places my sisters would follow me into – across rivers (irrigation ditches ) and over mountains (the wood pile) and through the vast wilderness. There was an old barn on our property that I shared with my sisters as a clubhouse. Until the day Tara fell through the roof of the lean to and was dangling by her armpits 6 feet from the ground.  Somehow I managed to climb up on something underneath her and rescue her but we were forever banned from that barn afterwards.  By the time we moved from that house there were a dozen other places we were no longer allowed to play because of the traps and trouble we managed to find. Like the field with the neighbor’s bull (it wasn’t so much the bull that was the problem as the manure we managed to drag home on our shoes) and the giant dog house (that really looked like it should be a play house) but was infested with fleas.

I would spend my summer days exploring the fields, woods and meadows behind my house.  Sometimes I would take my little sisters with me but mostly I went alone. I had secret forts and hiding places spread across the mile of farm and woodland behind my house. They were all mine. My Secrets.  My Fortresses. I remember sitting beneath the canopy of the willow tree with the fairies and crawling in the dirt through the cornfield like a soldier on a secret mission.

Then one day I went further than I had ever gone. Clear across to the dirt road that ran parallel to my street.  That’s where I found the cemetery where generations of my family have been laid to rest. I remember wandering the stones that shared my last name and longing to know who they were and what their lives had been like. The grass was so green and the sky so clear, but I could feel the age of the place. I could almost hear the whispers of the hundreds of stories stretched out over the last 150 years of my family’s history. I didn’t know any of the names on the stones then. Now I do. My mother is there, Uncle Fred and my grandparents. Friends are there too. The mother of a boy I went to high school with and the little brother of my childhood friend. I’ve visited that cemetery too often since that day I first discovered it. It still whispers every time I’m there.  Now though I know some of the stories. I know the hope they held for heaven. I know that more than anything else in the world they would want me to know the love of God as they know it now. Looking on his face.

I think they would be proud of me. Of the life I’ve led and the life I’ve laid down for the sake of the Kingdom of God.  Of the adventures I’ve had and the times I gave everything for the sake of discovering what God had next for me.  I guess I’m still a pioneer at heart. But I am not alone. I feel the great cloud of witnesses cheering me on, encouraging me and telling me that it is all worth it in the end. 

Christian Fellowship

The word “fellowship” has become a kind of Christian slang for the informal time spent with other believers, perhaps sharing a meal together. Many churches have rooms designated as the “fellowship hall” or include the words “Christian Fellowship” in their names. However, the Scriptural meaning of the Greek word “koinonia” (translated “fellowship” in the New International Version) is much deeper than our American church tradition implies. Historically, the word “koinonia” was used to describe a business partnership, marriage and the act of generous participation in a central connecting belief or experience. In his first Epistle John teaches that Christian fellowship centers around the doctrinal truth of who Jesus is, but also around a shared experience with Jesus and the Father with whom we also have fellowship. This synthesis of both a horizontal (with each other) and vertical fellowship (with God) sets apart the Christian Community.  

In the first chapter of his first Epistle, John introduces the two focuses that comprise his letter; the divinity of Jesus and Christian fellowship. First John, uncompromisingly declares Jesus as the divine Son of God and the Word of life. His witness is based on the actual physical encounter he had with Jesus whom the apostles testify they have “seen with our eyes, which we have looked at and our hands have touched” (I John 1:12, New International Version).  However, he also writes that his fellowship with the Father and Son is ongoing (1:3) and not just reserved for the time when Jesus walked on earth. His clarity on the issue of Jesus’ nature is intended to confront those in the church who have denied Jesus as the Christ (2:22) and that he came in the flesh (4:2-3), the implication being that they are not in fellowship with God or the church (2:19).  However, between those who experienced the truth of who Jesus Christ is and walk in light of that truth, true fellowship is experienced.

It is not only the doctrinal belief in Jesus that binds believers together, but the shared experience of salvation and the ongoing fellowship with the Father and the Son. John writes of this experience in 1:3 where he says, “We proclaim to you what we have seen and heard, so that you also may have fellowship with us. And our fellowship is with the Father and with his Son, Jesus Christ” (NIV). This idea is reminiscent of Jesus prayer in the Gospel of John 17:20-21 where he says, “I pray also for those who will believe in me through their message, that all of them may be one, Father, just as you are in me and I am in you. May they also be in us so that the world may believe that you have sent me” (NIV). It was Jesus’ desire that believers would continue to experience his work and presence as a part of their Christian life. It is this experience that binds Christian brothers and sisters together in fellowship not only with God but with each other. This is perhaps the most mysterious and remarkable part of Christian fellowship: that it is not just between people but includes fellowship with God.  

Our Father

While Jesus was on earth he was an example to us of what a relationship with God is supposed to look like. Jesus continually refers to God as his Father and our Father (Matthew 5:16, 45, 48, Luke 11:2, 13, John 20:17). This gives us important insight into the nature of God and how he desires for us to know him. While Jesus is described as our messiah, redeemer, savior, friend and bridegroom, God takes the name “Father.” Rather than the fearful or aloof gods of ancient culture, the Judeo-Christian God is one that desires a nurturing, loving relationship with his children. This is why Jesus describes God as a Father with a house (John 14:1) rather than a ruler with a kingdom or even a creator with his creation, although these attributes are also true.

We know that it was the Father’s desire to be in relationship with his children that motivated the incarnation of Christ and was the reason for his death and resurrection. Because of Jesus’ sacrifice for the sake of mankind’s reconciliation to God he can declare himself the only way to the Father (Jn. 14:6). There is no other way to be reconciled to Father God but through the cross of Christ. And there is no other way to relate to God than through the cross of Christ. There is nothing you can do with your own skill, strength or even spiritual giftedness that wins you an audience with God, much less a relationship. In fact, relying on these things is what empties the cross of its power, as Paul told the Corinthian Church, “Christ did not send me to baptize, but to preach the gospel—not with wisdom and eloquence, lest the cross of Christ be emptied of its power” (I Corinthians 1:17). Of course, many of us agree theologically that it is not by our own works that we have access to the Father, but if we are honest with ourselves, too often our theology does not match our experience. Perhaps part of the reason is that in a culture ruled by religious mandates and the intellectual desire for empirical evidence we are reluctant to embrace the foolishness of a relationship where I continually remain as a child, dependent on the love of my unseen Father (who some might think of as my imaginary friend). We are reluctant to appear foolish, as a spiritual novice, who simply lives abandoned to the love of Father God. But the Father is not looking for the experts, professionals or the gifted. He is looking for a child. This is your primary calling in life. Not to preach or minister or even serve. Simply to be his kid.

Relationship with God is not like relationship with people. Your experience with other people tells you that you must work hard to be attractive or win another’s affections. Your experience with other people tells you that if you do not live up to their expectations you risk rejection and abandonment. But as God’s child you are already attractive to him and you have already won his heart simply by being born. He will not reject or abandon you if you do not measure up because you already know you cannot measure up. His love is not based on what you can do but on what He has already done for you. All you must do to access an experience with this loving, perfect Father is to let go of your need to see with your eyes, hear with your ears and know with your intellect. You must with childlike faith believe in the unseen, that which you cannot grasp with your minds, and receive His love that is far beyond what you could ever deserve or even imagine. Then you will know what a relationship with God is like and you will experience this “love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God” (Ephesians 3:19).

Sons and Daughters

(beginning of Chapter One - I welcome feedback)

“Yet to all who received him, to those who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God – children born not of natural descent, nor of human decision or a husband’s will, but born of God.” John 1:12-13

“For through him we both have access to the Father by one Spirit.”
Ephesians 2:18

I have heard it said that religion is man’s attempt to reach God. I’ve experienced religion and its many forms; it’s strict protocols and procedures that promised I could earn acceptance from a Holy God. Different streams of Christianity develop their own list (mostly unspoken) of regulations. It doesn’t take long to adapt to a local body’s specific way of practicing spirituality. If you don’t figure it out on your own, someone will be quick to point it out to you. For a while I believed that if I read my Bible and prayed every morning God would like me more and good things would happen for me. After several decades of believing that, I added the belief that nearness to God can be measured by a person’s display of charisma or physical manifestation. There was one man in our church who prayed such good prayers. He would stand with his face towards heaven and eyes open as if viewing the very throne of God. Without any microphone his voice would fill the room, above the music of the worship team or the crying of any babies. He was so eloquent and the presence of God could be felt as he prayed. Surely he must have such a close relationship with God. Then there was the woman who rocked back and forth in her seat, hands shaking and eyes squeezed shut with intensity. “She must be having a vision” I would think and wish that I was spiritual enough to experience God like that. Imagine my astonishment and disappointment when I began to know them outside of the worship service. They were human beings like me; broken, insecure, and trapped in the cycle of performing for their God’s affection. I thought that because I had become charismatic I was free from the religious spirit, but it turned out I just traded brands of legalism.

The Pharisees perfected this lifestyle of legalism turning the Torah, what God required of them, into Halacha, volumes of rabbinic teaching and religious tradition that served as Jewish law. Not only were they good at following the rules they were rulebook craftsmen, inventing all kinds of good works that would make them acceptable to God. (Sound familiar?) It was this kind of religion that led Jesus to ask them, “Why do you break the command of God for the sake of your tradition?” (Matthew 15:3).

However, I have good news for those of you who, like me, are not necessarily good at following rules. Actually this is good news for everyone, because none of us could ever follow the rules well enough. The Bible never describes God’s desire for a group of good moral people who know how to follow the rules. The Scripture from cover to cover describes God’s desire for a family. For sons and daughters so passionately in love with him that they look for ways to please him. God’s invitation is not for us to become robots that perfectly carry out his every dictate but for us to become a part of his family, one with him, filled with his fullness, partakers of the divine nature of God.

That is the way it all began in the garden. There was nothing separating Adam and Eve from their creator and they walked in perfect communion with him. Created in God’s very image, brought to life by the very breath of God, and given the purpose and destiny of ruling God’s creation, they were whole, unbroken, holy and pure before their maker. Not only that but the relationship between Adam and Eve was pure and whole with no shame or selfish ambition. They were in perfect unity with one another, created from one flesh and united into one flesh through marriage. When Adam and Eve decided to rebel against God not only did their relationship with God break, but their relationship with one another. Eve was no longer Adam’s helper, but his servant.

Our understanding of what it is to have a relationship with God is limited by our human experience of relationship. We see God through the lenses of the brokenness and pain we have too often experienced. It is difficult not to do this when a relationship with God is not physical like with another human being; we cannot see him with our eyes, touch him with our hands, or hear him with our ears. All we know is what we have experienced before with flesh and blood people. After being born again by the Spirit we must somehow learn to maneuver in this new realm of the spirit if we are to experience the relationship with God that he desires.

The problem is that our modern intellectual minds relegate that which we cannot see, hear, touch, taste or smell to some inferior, questionable realm of experience. Can we really believe that it is God speaking to us? Can we expect to experience him and how do we know these experiences are not creations of our own imaginations? A relationship with God is reliant on faith that the still small voice or that which seems coincidental is truly God reaching out for relationship with us. This truth is hard to believe for those who are so constantly surrounded by the mundane, insignificant and realistic. How is it that an all-powerful, infinite Creator would want to have a relationship with an individual, insignificant human being? And what kind of relationship does God desire to have with us?

Running with Horses, Moving Like Wind

(Introduction to a book I am writing).

I believe that the spiritual supersedes the natural yet I have often wondered why it is that the natural seems to rule our experience here on earth. In fact, most of the time, most of us are totally unaware of the spiritual dimension of life. Not only that but the few who seem to be in touch with the spiritual realm seem out of touch with reality to the rest of us. On the few occasions where someone has an experience that could be rated supernatural it’s near impossible to know really why or how it happened. Are these experiences what it means to “be in the Spirit” (Revelation 1:10), a passing statement made by the Apostle John and followed by his account of an incredible vision?

As I read Scripture about the Holy Spirit, his transformation and empowerment of the early church and some of the more mystical passages regarding his ministry, I know that there is something more I am to be experiencing in my Christian life. I know that what I and so many of us have come to know as normal Christianity is not what the Lord intended when he filled us with His Spirit. What is the Christian life really supposed to be like?

There are two passages in Scripture that have captured my attention regarding this question. One is in Jeremiah 12 where the prophet Jeremiah voices his complaint to God about the prosperity of the wicked and God’s apparent lack of justice. As He does so many times God does not directly answer Jeremiah’s question but responds to a bigger issue by saying, “If you have raced with men on foot and they have wore you out, how can you compete with horses? If you stumble in safe country, how will you manage in the thickets by the Jordan?” God goes on to tell Jeremiah that he should not even trust the members of his own household and then describes His own broken heart over the spiritual condition of His beloved Israel. What is amazing to me in this passage is God’s expectation that despite even the betrayal of his own family Jeremiah will rise above what is normal humanity to some supernatural level described as “competing with horses.” How could God expect this from a man living before the New Covenant went into effect and still bound to the sinful nature and the Jewish law? More importantly, what does this mean for me, living under the grace of the New Covenant, filled with the Holy Spirit and no longer in bondage to a sinful nature or religious law?

The second passage holds the most well-known verse in the Bible, and surrounding it some of the most mystical verses in the Bible. In John chapter 3 Nicodemus, a religious leader, has come to Jesus in secret to inquire about the Kingdom of God. Jesus starts by telling him,

“Very truly I tell you, no one can see the kingdom of God unless they are born again… Very truly I tell you, no one can enter the kingdom of God unless they are born of water and the Spirit. Flesh gives birth to flesh, but the Spirit gives birth to spirit. You should not be surprised at my saying, ‘You must be born again.’ The wind blows wherever it pleases. You hear its sound, but you cannot tell where it comes from or where it is going. So it is with everyone born of the Spirit” (John 3:3-8).

Even though I grew up reading this passage and learning about it in Sunday School somehow I missed what Jesus was saying. Somehow I read this verse as saying that the Holy Spirit is like the wind, you don’t know where He is coming from or going to. Then several years ago I was awaken out of a dream in the middle of the night and the Lord spoke verse 6 to me as an interpretation of the dream; “Flesh gives birth to flesh, but Spirit gives birth to spirit.” In the past I had tied a nice little bow on John chapter 3 entitled “the Salvation experience” however, God was speaking a right now word to me through this passage. It caused me to go back and read the passage with new eyes and for the first time I realized that when Jesus described the wind in John 3 he was describing human beings, born of the Spirit, who, like the wind, “blows wherever it pleases. You hear its sound, but you cannot tell where it comes from or where it is going.” I began to realize that these verses are describing so much more than our one time experience of being born again. There is an expectation of continual birthing in the life of the believer as they stop depending on their own flesh, that which is natural (human strength and strategies) and learn to let the Holy Spirit give greater life and awareness to their own spirit.

My neat bow suddenly unraveled and I was left with a passage where every verse held depths unfathomable to my human brain, much less my experience. I no longer judged Nicodemuses response so harshly, after all I as a Pastor’s kid and a Pastor had missed this passages meaning my entire life. Jesus’ response to Nicodemus in the next verse took on an entirely more personal meaning to me:

“You are Israel’s teacher and do you not understand these things? Very truly I tell you, we speak of what we know, and we testify to what we have seen, but still you people do not accept our testimony. I have spoken to you of earthly things and you do not believe; how then will you believe if I speak of heavenly things? No one has ever gone into heaven except the one who came from heaven—the Son of Man. Just as Moses lifted up the snake in the wilderness, so the Son of Man must be lifted up, that everyone who believes may have eternal life in him. For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life” (italics mine).

For many of us our Christian tradition has equated eternal life to the “sweet by and by” when we go to live with Jesus after we die. This misunderstanding allows us to neatly organize our lives so that Scripture passages that seem to have high expectations can be relegated to the afterlife. Yet Jesus’ definition of eternal life is clear, “that they know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom you have sent” (John 17:3). This is the desire of our Lord’s heart; not that we would barely make it through until he returns, but that we would understand in the here and now what it is to know God, to be one with Him (John 17:21-23), even “filled to the measure of all the fullness of God” (Ephesians 3:19). Not when we die and no longer have to deal with the vices of this world and our own human nature, but right now in this moment. It’s why he left heaven and was born as a man. It’s what he died for; so that we could transcend our human nature and become “partakers of the divine nature” (2 Peter 1:4). Able to supernaturally run a race with horses and keep up. Able to move like wind.

I want to live in the abundance of life Jesus came to give me, yet I struggle to live above my mere human experience. This book is an attempt to reconcile my normal life with the expectation that God has for my life as laid out in Scripture. I am asking the Holy Spirit to be my teacher and reveal to me what a normal Christian life should look like, born again and empowered by the Holy Spirit. I am glad you are along for the adventure.